Maddi was still amazed. In the last two years her desire for sex had exploded. Thinking back, she tried to imagine having gone through life the way things had been. Having sex weekly, and weakly. It had all started with her desire to redecorate the master bedroom.
Getting ready for bed one night she had offhandedly made a comment, “Jake, I’d like to make some changes in the bedroom.”
He paused while pulling off his shirt and responded with a devious grin, “Me too!”
“No, I’m not talking about sex, I’m talking about adding crown molding, new paint, new pictures on the wall and maybe a new comforter.”
His sad eyes said it all and his desire to continue the conversation quickly evaporated.
Discussing sex was something they just never had done, it just wasn’t proper. They had both been raised to believe sex was something done with the lights out, no talking and never ever discussed.
Apparently, the extra glass of wine at dinner had lowered her inhibitions just enough, with out even thinking she said, “Tell ya what, you make a list of changes you’d like to see in the bedroom, I’ll make a list of changes I’d like to see and we’ll commence negotiations.”
She could see she had his attention and didn’t want to lose him, “It’s not like we are have to do everything on each of the lists, but it might be fun.”
Jake sat on the bed looking off into space.
“Jake, Jake….Jake…are you listening to me?”
“Uh yeah, sorry…just had started my list in my mind and got carried away…sorry.” His smile had returned.
“Okay, then, it's settled, I’ll make my list, you make yours and tomorrow night at 9:00 pm, we compare.”
By eight o’clock the following morning Maddi had finished her list.
1. Crown molding
2. New paint
3. New blinds for the windows
4. A new comforter
5. New pictures on the wall
Simple, not to much to ask. Jake shouldn’t have any problems with these simple requests.
Setting her list aside she went about the rest of her daily chores and felt as though she was being reasonable and very low maintenance.
At noon, Jake sent her a text, “So, how goes the list?”
“Finished over morning coffee, yours?” she replied.
“Just about finished. How many things are on your list?”
“Five, how bout yours?”
No response. Silence. Nothing.
“Jake, how many?”
“Uhhh fifteen….but I can shorten it…”
She was amazed. Fifteen things he wanted to change about their sex life. What on earth could he be thinking? She was instantly very curious. She wasn’t sure if she should be angry, offended, excited, dreadful or pleased. They had always communicated well about everything, well almost everything. Just because they never talked about sex didn’t mean it was bad…did it?
“Umm no, don’t shorten it, I think I’m looking forward to it.”
“Okay then, see ya tonight.”
By 8:45 Maddi was a mess, her mind was bouncing, she was excited, but nervous. She sat on the edge of the bed, her simple list of five items folded beside her. She waited and wondered.
Jake came into the room at exactly 9:00. He joined her on the bed somewhat sheepishly and asked, “Ready?”
“Yeah, I’m ready, how are we going to do this?”
“I say we read them at the same time, although you might have to read a little longer than me.”
“Okay then, let’s exchange.”
He handed her his list and took hers. He glanced at the five items before him and was surprised at how simple they were. He pretended to be reading and rereading them as he watched her slowly unfold his type written list.
“Jake, you said fifteen…this list has twenty-three things on it.”
“Well, you said not to shorten it, and I figured I might as well use this opportunity to really let go. I will warn you, I strayed off topic and all of these aren’t exactly in the bedroom.”
She began to read quietly to herself. She intended to not have any response to anything she might find.
1. From now on, we both come to bed naked.
2. Sex is no longer just on the weekends.
3. Sometimes we leave the lights on.
4. We talk about what feels good.
5. Since talking about sex is something new, we develop signals for things we would like.
6. We buy whipped cream and use it on each other.
7. You shave …down there.
By now, Maddi could feel her face turning red. Where had he gotten these ideas? Why did having him watch her read these sexual things make her feel dirty and aroused at the same time?
8. We try different positions every time we have sex.
9. We shower together regularly.
10. We watch each other touch ourselves.
At this one, she literally felt her stomach tighten. She had no idea if he masturbated, but she had been using the shower as her own personal play time for years. It wasn’t that she didn’t like sex with Jake, it was just…nice to have her orgasm her way and he wanted to watch this?
11. I lick you down there.
12. You suck me…down there.
13. Outside sex.
14. Go parking and make out.
15. Sex in different rooms of the house when the kids are asleep or gone.
16. Read erotic stories to each other.
17. Write erotic stories for each other to continue our sexual communication.
18. Sex toys?
Sex toys! What kind of pervert is he? How could he even think of things like this? Why was she soaking wet between her thighs?
19. Quickie sex from time to time.
20. Sex games, like picking ideas of things to do from a hat etc. etc.
21. Phone sex.
22. Role playing.
23. Keep our own sex journals and share them with each other regularly.
Maddi didn’t want to be done…she wanted to keep reading, she knew as soon as she was done he would be expecting some sort of conversation. How could she talk about these things? How could she look him in the eye? How could she hide the flush on her skin, the quaver in her voice and the wetness between her legs.
Sensing her un-ease, he spoke first, “Maddi, I know this is a lot of stuff to take in at once, I didn’t come up with all of these on my own. In fact, as I sat down to write this list I was at a loss, I didn’t know where to start. I searched the internet for healthy sex ideas for couples and stumbled onto a website that I hope will change our lives. I read and read and read some more and found myself becoming very aroused.”
He opened his laptop, entered a site address and handed it to her to read. Kissing her on the head he said, “You start to explore this site, I’ll be back in half an hour.”
“Where are you going?”
“Oh, I thought I’d go find you some paint samples, if you’re willing to work on my list, the least I can do is get a start on yours.”