Boring In Bed
Add: 4 January 2016 / 08:00
I tried to just laugh it off like he did and not let it bother me. But if I was being honest with myself, Dan’s little joke had actually struck a chord deep within me. Boring in bed, he had said before bursting out laughing last night when we were out having some drinks after dinner.
Sure, maybe I had brought it on by asking what is the one thing he would change about me. It was just a silly question I asked hoping to bate him into a ridiculous answer like ‘Nothing, baby. You’re perfect.’ Pathetic? A little but all women do this. Don’t kid yourself.
He saw right through my little game and tossed out a joke. I laughed it off until the subject had changed but it was the first thing I had thought of this morning. How dare he? I am not boring in bed! I thought more and more about it as the morning went on and began to worry. Holy shit, maybe I am boring in bed, I thought to myself.
I immediately called my best friend, Sandra. I didn’t even waste time with pleasantries. We’ve been friends since fourth grade; there was no need to beat around the bush.
“Sand, I need your opinion. Dan made a joke last night about me being boring in bed. I’ve been thinking about it all day and now I feel like he might be serious, and worse than that, he might be right!”
“Callie, calm down. Let’s think through this logically… Why do you think you’re boring?”
“Well… I don’t know. I was trying to think of anything I’ve done during sex that would seem exciting and I couldn’t come up with a single thing! I think I’m lame in the sack!”
“Okay… Do you blow him?”
“Do you let him go down on you?”
“No… I don’t really like that. I get self conscious.”
“What’s your favorite position?”
“What is his favorite position?”
“Um… he always asks me to get on top and sometimes I do!”
“Sometimes? You mean other times you just say no and stick to missionary?”
There was a pause.
“Any toys or anything to add a little spice?”
“We used one of those vibrating cock rings once and it felt pretty good but it was so intense that he came after like one minute inside me,” I told her.
“That’s it?” she asked.
“I think so.”
“Jesus, Cal. Yeah, you might be right. I’m sorry, but that seems a little vanilla to me.”
“Shit! I knew it. I guess I never thought about it. I just figured that letting him fuck me once a week was good enough.”
“Once a week?! That’s it?! You’re 25, Callie – not 46!”
“That isn’t enough?!”
“Fuck no!” She told me, “You need to triple that while you're young if you want to keep him around. And add a little spice for fuck’s sake.”
“Okay, you need to help me. How do I ‘add spice’ to the bedroom?” I asked.
“I’m going to do a little research and order some stuff for you. Consider it a late Christmas present. Just keep an eye on your email for shipping notifications so Dan doesn’t see it before you do,” she told me.
We chatted a little more and then hung up. I was nervous and excited. Sandra was also married and seemed to know what she was talking about. She had always been a little more adventurous than I was, especially when it came to sexual matters. Between the two of us, she was always the first to do something with boys and ended up teaching me how when I was ready.
Sure enough, about forty-five minutes later, there was an email in my inbox saying that my package would arrive on Thursday but there were no details on what was included. I’m sure Sandra did that on purpose.
On Thursday, I took a sick day to be sure I was home when the package arrived. At 1pm, there was a knock on the door and a deliveryman was asking me to sign for my mystery box. I kept my cool until he left, but as soon as the door closed, I sprinted up to my bedroom with the box.
When I opened it, there was a note on top of several unmarked smaller boxes inside.
Read before opening:
Welcome to the Pleasure of the Month Club. We’re excited to have you! This first box is a starter pack selected specially for you by our experts based on the survey that was filled out on your behalf by your friend Sandra.
Each product will have its own set of instructions, so be sure to read through them thoroughly. Following these directions will ensure complete satisfaction. This first collection of products is meant to be used all at once. It may seem like a lot but based on the survey, it sounds like you need a Shock and Awe kind of night.
Remember, confidence is key. Hold nothing back and we promise a night you won’t soon forget.
Pleasure of the Month Club
Holy shit – Sandra had gone all out. I pulled the boxes out and lined them up on the bed. There were six in all. I opened them one by one and laid the contents out.
Each box held something exciting that I had only heard of but never seen in real life.
There was a set of restraints designed to go under the mattress and hold a person in place by their wrists and ankles. There was a small tube of ‘tingling’ lubricant. The next box held a small butt plug ‘specially designed to stimulate the prostate’. Next, there was a blindfold. The second last box was somewhat shocking – it contained a penis pump with a ruler painted on the side. Last, a tiny package included two tiny blue pills – Viagra.
I read through the instructions carefully. I was astounded at the level of detail. They all related to each of the other hand-selected products. I now had a plan of action – when to use each of the products and how. I suddenly realized that reading through all these explicit directions and handling each product had me feeling pretty aroused. My panties were definitely damp.
I had a sudden urge to take care of myself but I remembered the last bit of advice in the note inside one of the boxes:
…Now you may be a little worked up after reading all these directions and imagining how you might use them later tonight. Try your best to hold off and not touch yourself. It will make tonight’s events just that much more explosive.
Fine, I thought, I can make it until tonight. I never masturbate anyway so I would just do some chores and make dinner until Dan gets home.
Later that night…
As we cleaned up after dinner, I could barely believe how turned on I was. I had been thinking about sex all day long and it was certainly having an effect on me.
“Babe, I was thinking that maybe tonight we could… you know…” I said to Dan, sheepishly.
His eyes went wide with surprise. I was never the one to start the ball rolling on sex.
“Uh, yeah… of course!” he replied.
“Okay – I was thinking we could try something new tonight… so you’ll just have to trust me with it, okay?”
“Yeah, babe, of course.”
I had originally planned on having a drink and watching a little TV before heading upstairs but Dan was all over me immediately. Normally, I would be able to fend him off and make him wait, but my body was already humming with arousal so his touch was like fire.
We began kissing and his hands were all over my body. It was a very passionate kiss and he was already peeling off my clothes. If I wasn’t careful, we would be fucking in the kitchen before I even had chance to get him upstairs.
I broke off the kiss and pulled him by the hand, leading him upstairs to our bedroom. I already had the restraints attached to the bed but out of sight under the covers.
“Okay, stand here, close your eyes, and don’t move,” I told him.
I grabbed the blindfold out of the nightstand and placed it over his head.
“Oh, someone is feeling kinky tonight,” he said, laughing.
Without responding – the instructions said the less talking, the better – I began talking his clothes off. First, I removed his shirt slowly, and then moved down to his pants where there was already a sizable lump. Once he was down to his boxer briefs, I lead him to the bed where I removed the comforter, revealing the restraints.
I attached the top restraints to his wrists, much to his excitement. Next, I slipped the Viagra past his lips and told him to swallow. He had caught on to the fact that I was not going to be speaking much, so he was now just going along with whatever I asked of him.
With his wrists strapped to the bed and down to his underwear, I gave him a kiss on the cheek and slipped out of the room. I was going to make him wait a little bit while the Viagra got through his system.
During that time, I went down stairs and poured myself a small glass of wine to calm my nerves. I was so horny I was shaking. I had to calm down a little bit or I was just going to peel off those boxers and fuck his brains out for a few minutes until he came. I had much more planned so I had to control myself.
When I returned to the room, Dan was laying silently with a full-fledged erection under his briefs. Seeing that the Viagra must have kicked in, I crept up to the bed and removed his last stitch of clothing. His cock stuck straight up in the air, hard as a rock. It was time for phase two of the plan. I attached the ankle restraints and he was now completely naked in a spread eagle position across the bed. He looked so vulnerable but was still somehow completely calm. I guess he really did trust me.
Or maybe he still thought I was too boring to do anything really wild. I was about to change that thought. I grabbed his cock and began stroking him excruciatingly slowly. He let out a moan as I stroked. The Viagra really did its job, as he was harder than I had ever felt.
After about a minute, I stopped playing with his dick and grabbed the lube. Time to make things interesting! I squeezed a big glob on the tip of my finger and before it had time to drip off, I swiftly applied it to his asshole. He tensed up when he felt it make contact.
“What the fuck?!” He yelped.
I ignored him and his panic and began working the lube into his ass. Slowly, he relaxed and I slipped my middle finger inside him.
“Babe, that feels amazing! What made you want to try…”
He trailed off as I pushed a second finger inside his ass and made contact with what I assumed was his prostate.
He felt ready for the next step. I removed my fingers and wiped the lube off of them on a towel I had next to me. I grabbed the rubber butt plug and gave it a heavy coat of the lube. He was lubed up pretty well and my fingers had even loosened him a bit, but the head of this thing was a little bigger than my fingers so it was going to be a tight fit. It looked a bit like a medium sized egg on a shaft with the thickness of a piece of chalk, with a wide base that would keep it from slipping inside completely.
I placed the tip at his entrance and told him to relax. When I felt him exhale, I began pushing the plug inside. Slowly, I pushed. He was moaning and struggling against the restraint. Once it got to a little past the halfway point of the egg, it slipped all the way in and he let out a groan.
“Oh my god, that feels huge! But it also feels incredible. What is that?” he asked, in between deep breaths.
His cock was bobbing in front of me and I couldn’t resist going off script. I sucked him into my mouth and I could tell I surprised him because he moaned and his hips bounced off the bed, forcing his entire dick into my throat. I gagged and released him from my mouth.
“Alright, baby, are you ready for the real fun?” I said as seductively as possible.
“The real fun? God yes, I am so worked up, I’m ready for anything,” he said.
Throughout all of this, I was still dressed. I got off the bed and began shedding my clothing as quickly as possible. Once I was down to my bra and panties, I reached down to feel the front of my thong. It was soaked all the way through. I knew that I had never been so physically aroused in my life.
I unhooked and shimmied out of my bra, freeing my c-cup breasts and rock-hard nipples. With my wet panties still in place, I straddled his head like I was going to 69 with him but stayed upright, covering his mouth and nose with the soaked gusset of my thong. I felt his breath on my sex and he began planting little kisses on my pussy through my panties.
“Cal, you’re wetter than you’ve ever been. This is so hot!” he said, though slightly muffled due to my sitting on his face.
I reached over to the nightstand and grabbed the lube and last toy for the night – the cock pump. Putting a small dab of the lube in my hand, I reached down and smeared it on his still-hard penis. Next I slid his dick inside and felt him shudder beneath me. Once I had him all the way inside and had a good seal, I squeezed the bulb at the end of the hose attached to the tube.
After a few squeezes, his cock was being pumped up inside the tube. I watched with amazement as he grew from his normal six inches to eight inches. It also got much thicker, which I forgot would happen. It was shocking to see how much larger his penis got!
I’d been with a couple guys before him that were about the same size as Dan or smaller and one guy that had been bigger but not by much. I remember that big one filling me up and making me cum like a whore. I was in college then and met Dan a short time later. Since then, I had been satisfied with his equipment. But seeing its current state, it brought back memories and I could not wait to slide Dan’s new monster into my pussy.
The instructions told me that I was to pump it until it looked like it was as big as it would go and then leave it pumped for fifteen minutes. I decided that Dan could eat my pussy during that time before I went insane. He had been slightly distracted by the pumping and stopped his attention to my panty-clad cunt.
Sitting back up, I reached down and pulled my thong to the side and sank down onto his face with a little more force than before. I smashed my dripping pussy lips onto his mouth.
“Okay, baby, time for an appetizer before the main course,” I said.
Dan licked and sucked me like a wild man from the second I moved my panties to the side. An entire day of being aroused meant that it only took about a minute for my first orgasm to tear through me.
“Oh fuck!” I screamed.
Dan paid no attention and kept eating me with all he had. His nose was tickling my freshly waxed asshole (also in the instructions) while he alternated between sucking my clit and snaking his long tongue into my vagina. In a few more minutes, I was on the edge of another orgasm. Dan sensed it and latched onto my clit with his lips and assaulted it with his tongue. I screamed out again as my second orgasm rolled through me.
The fifteen minutes was about up so I picked up the pump bulb and pressed the release valve. The pump lost its suction and I was able to slowly pull it away from Dan’s dick. I noticed that despite the pump no longer working its magic, his cock stayed at its extra swollen size. I took it in my hand and immediately noticed a couple of things. It was heavier than ever before, the extra two inches in length made it seem like an absolute monster, and it was too thick for my fingers to wrap around.
It was also hard as steel, which meant I needed to get it inside me ASAP. I lifted myself off Dan’s face and spun myself around so I was in the position to ride him facing him. I took his blindfold off so he could watch me take his newly expanded cock into my tight pussy.
“Holy shit – my dick looks huge!” he exclaimed.
I couldn’t take it anymore. I was in a sexual haze. I had no more ability to tease or be sexy; I needed to be fucked immediately. Grabbing Dan’s cock, I lined up my pussy up above it and began to work it into myself.
It stretched me more than ever before. By the time the head was in, I was dripping sweat. My body was working overtime to accept this newly oversized invader. I pushed down with more of my body weight and felt the rest of his dick slide inside me until it was making contact with my cervix. I sat still for a moment, attempting to adjust to his size.
Once the pain subsided, pleasure took over and it was time to ride my fiancé’s monster cock. I was performing long deep strokes, raising up all the way until just the head was inside before slowly returning back down until he was balls deep. This slow fucking was building an orgasm deep inside me.
Placing my hands on his chest, be began speeding up my pace. Soon I was bouncing on his cock like a mad woman and that orgasm was threatening to tear through my body.
“I’m… going to… cum… soon,” I said through clenched teeth.
It was like that was all he needed to hear. I felt him tense up and begin to shoot his load inside my sensitive pussy. Like a chain reaction, his orgasm triggered my own and ripped through me like a hurricane.
“Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh my fuck! Oh my god! Yes! Oh!” I yelled complete nonsense as I came.
Leaving him inside me, I lay down on his chest and felt our hearts beat together. He leaned his head down and kissed the top of my head.
“That was incredible,” he said, breathing heavily.
His words snapped me back to reality and I remembered that I still had another step to complete the plan. I squeezed my pussy muscles and felt that his dick was still rock hard inside of me – thanks, Viagra!
I slide off of him and lowered my face to his soaked penis. This wasn’t part of plan but I wanted to taste our juices on him. Grabbing him by the base, I took a long suck on the first three inches of cock. Mmm… I thought, salty but a little sweet too!
It was now or never. I barely had any energy left and it was time for the grand finale. I spun away from him and lowered myself into a reverse cowgirl position. I reached between us and grabbed his dick, lining it up with my cunt. I dipped down and inserted the first four inches or so, to get it nice and wet. Then, to his surprise, I pulled off of him and adjusted my position so that he was aligned with my asshole. The combination of our juices all over our genitals and my relaxed state after a ridiculous series of orgasms allowed me to slide the tip of his cock into my asshole with relative ease. Holy shit, I was doing anal!
I lowered myself until he was completely inside me. I was rubbing my clit the entire time so the pain was constantly competing with pleasure for my attention. I wouldn’t be able to ride him with the intensity that I did before out of fear it would destroy my bowels. I build a slow, consistent pace and in very little time, the tightness of my butt was too much for Dan to handle. For the second time in about ten minutes, he was letting loose another huge load of cum inside me.
I kept riding as he came, and flicked my clit to a final orgasm of my own. Slowly, I released his firm but not hard dick from my ass and curled up next to him as I undid the restraints on his wrists.
“Holy hell, what has come over you?!” Dan said.
“Oh nothing…” I said, “but I bet you’ll never call me ‘boring in bed’ again, will you?!”